Always Something
6:14 PMI feel like I just learned a really valuable lesson. I wish I could have learned it two years ago before I got married. But I'm young, immature, and have got a ways to go. At least I learned a new lesson. Better late than never, right?
One evening a couple weeks ago, Jensen and I were sitting on our futon, when we felt an earthquake. This one was not so big, it was a 3 pointer. I sat up quickly and we were like, "Whoa, okay." But then we just moved on. Having grown up in San Diego we were familiar with those.
Then within the next hour, a 5.1 hit. The epicenter was ONE MILE away from our apartment. AND not to mention we live on a 2nd story. No ground underneath us. This time, I jumped off of the futon, and started to run towards our bedroom door frame (first instinct). I stop halfway there. My body felt frozen. It was like my brain didn't even think. So I just stood there and started crying when I hear the earthquake get louder and louder. I hear stuff falling off of my dresser, shelves, the desk. The windows are rattling. Jensen runs to me to try to comfort me. I'm so terrified that I jumped in his arms and gave him the death grip like a frightened cat up in a tree. He then carries me under the doorway, not knowing what else to do either. And we hugged each other so tightly. Then it was over. Those 10 seconds were awful. I was balling. Jensen was really scared too. That entire night was awful too. There countless aftershocks. Some were pretty big, like 3 pointers. We got no more than an hour of sleep. I kept crying during the night when I'd feel them. Early in the morning, we decided to bolt for San Diego to get away from all the constant shaking and paranoia. So afraid that the aftershock was another big one. Even while we were quickly getting ready in the morning, we felt more aftershocks. Once we got to my parents' house, Jensen kept checking this app that is connected to the USGS. He was telling me there was a 4 pointer aftershock here. And more and more in the 2's and 3's. Some were smaller in the 1's. I was so grateful to be able to get a break from it all for a weekend.
But it didn't stop there. Once we came back Sunday evening, they'd still come. Monday and Tuesday I was barely home. I went to school with Jensen. I ate lunch with his friends, met a couple of his teachers. Took a nap in the car. Sit at a table outside on campus and play my word games. I felt one while just sitting there outside. And another while I was sitting in the car! Jensen was sweet and stepped outside of class for a couple minutes to check on me when we'd all feel an aftershock. I just couldn't be home alone and hear everything shaking around me. It was better to be outside and right near Jensen. Though it's not like he can stop them. Just made me feel a little better. They started to slow down more and more throughout the last week. Though, I'm still paranoid. I still haven't been able to sleep through an entire night without waking up to someone slamming their door in our building, which slightly shaking our walls :-(
I do have to be grateful though, because we didn't have any property or structural damage. And our power and plumbing was fine. We know people in our ward and stake who have really bad damages and power outages. We weren't hurt. Nothing broke. The Lord really does watch over you and protect you. Needless to say, I quickly put together 72 hr. kits for us so we are prepared. It also makes you so aware of God's power. He could have destroyed all of LA and OC if He wanted to. Easily. It really makes you ask yourself, "Am I ready to meet my Maker? And if not, what are the changes I need to make?"
So on top of those lessons I learned, this is another one. One of the changes I'm working on. To be grateful, because no matter where you live, there is always something. Whether you live in Washington with daily buckets of rain, Louisiana with hurricanes, Utah with snowstorms, in California with earthquakes, or even if you feel you live in a little, "boring" small town in the middle of nowhere. There is always something. There is no perfect place to live.
You could also apply this to your current circumstance in life. Whether you're single, married, divorced. Old or young. A college student. Out in the workforce. Out in the airforce. Married with kids, married without kids. Everyone has problems. Sometimes people act as though they don't have any issues, and unless they tell us otherwise we tend to deem them as "perfect"; nevertheless, THEY STILL HAVE PROBLEMS. Even if you never find out what their problems are. The grass is not greener on the other side. Your grass is just fine. MY grass is just fine.
Sheryl Crow's song "Soak up the Sun" says it all. There's a line that goes, "It's not having what you want, it's wanting what you've got."
Isn't that so true?! JUST WANT WHAT YOU ALREADY HAVE! That makes things so much easier! No comparing yourself to others, no depression, no judging, no grudges, and no jealously.
I'm certainly still a work in progress, but I'm definitely learning this lesson. That's why I wish I would have known that before I got married and moved to Utah. Oh well. Life goes on.
Hakuna Matata.
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